More Feedback

After a day off yesterday for a haircut, Christmas shopping, and the new Hobbit movie, I have a lot of catching up to do in my writing world. Even without yesterday off, I’d have much to do—which is partly because I received feedback from two more of my Pitch Wars mentors. (If either of you are reading this, THANK YOU! You’re both amazing and I’m so grateful for your feedback.)

One mentor said that she loved my query with one exception—which I fixed a few days ago, before I’d gotten her feedback. We were on the same page here, and I love that. She also mentioned that she likes where the MS starts and the pages are well written. Though my MS wasn’t perfect for her, the right agent will love it. Woohoo!

As for the other mentor, her thoughts were positive, but very honest. Two things stuck with me: one, that my query hinted at horror and that scared her off; two, that I need to do more line editing.

1.       HORROR. So. That. The thing is, I love Stephen King’s novels—except that this statement is way too general. I love Stephen King’s epic novels: THE DARK TOWER series, UNDER THE DOME, 11/22/63, THE STAND. What I don’t love? The horror ones. They freak me out. I haven’t read THE SHINING because I’m afraid I’ll be like Rachel and Joey from Friends and be so scared that I’ll need to hide it in the freezer. This can’t be good, right? Still, I can see how this mentor saw signs of horror in my query. I’m drawn to darkness. I like dark books, dark themes, dark places, so of course my MS is pretty dark. It deals with the fabric of reality and what happens when that starts to break down. It contains black beasts that stalk the MC, who hears haunting whispers and dreams that someone she knows, someone who has disappeared, is being tortured. Dark, right? But horror? (As you’re reading this, I’m sure you’re thinking…so what’s up with the pink flowers? They were my favorite flower from my honeymoon in Hawaii. They remind me that not all is dark. They remind me of beauty and light. That’s why they’re there.)

2.       LINE EDITING. This was my mentor’s way of telling me I need a CP. Guess what? I’ve recruited a few in the past week or so. They haven’t delved deep into my MS yet, but we’re getting to that. I look forward to their suggestions. I look forward to helping them improve their writing and their suggestions helping improve my writing. I love this. Again, this is something I didn’t know existed until I joined the Twitter world. I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again: I LOVE TWITTER.

Aside from horror and edits, this mentor’s most significant message? RESIST IMPATIENCE TO QUERY. I hear you and I’m listening. I’m going to keep working, starting the moment I’ve posted and promoted this. First on my list is to switch my MS from third person to first person POV. This may enhance the horror because there will be less distance between MC and reader, but overall it’ll be a good change. I’ve already revamped the first chapter because of suggestions from a third mentor (the first to send me feedback) and a couple of fellow writers. Yes, I’ll resist my impatience to query RIGHT NOW, but I’ll be making my MS better and better and better. My husband says I need tea and time, both of which I have. Querying will be there when I’m ready.